It’s never too late to add a few new tools into you parenting tool box! Yesterday I taught a class of young moms, seasoned moms, and care givers. And (score!) they fed me homemade Nepali lunch and Khaja (snacks).
“So many things I learned today. I intend to do the good things. But today l learned how to be a better mom.”
– A momma after yesterday’s parenting class
A loving home has rules. Toddlers, children, adolescents, and even young adults need rules to thrive. Rules provide boundaries and structure. Our children will feel more secure, cared for, and learn to function in other relationships and circumstances with more structure, self-control, and healthy boundaries if we raise them in a home with healthy rules.
Healthy rules are given to our children because we love them. Often, the rules we set are imposed to keep them safe. We should expect and enforce full obedience.
Are the kids in your care obedient? What is obedience?
Obedience = First Time + Happy Heart
TRY THIS
Train your children to respond to directions, correction, or instruction by saying “yes sir/mom/didi ect.”
Responding in this manner will encourage a heart of obedience. If the automatic response is yes… a child is more likely to follow through and obey.
Young children do not need to understand why they need to do what you say. They simply need to be taught to follow directions the first time, and with a good attitude. As children get older and their communication, understanding and cognitive development increases, you can begin to teach them why your family has some of the rules that you do. And as children move into adolescence and early adulthood, they can be a part of the process in determining what rules they should follow.
FOR EXAMPLE
In order to receive the amount of sleep required for healthy development, children are given a bedtime. They may be put to bed at 8:00 pm. There is no need or reason to negotiate or waiver with a young child about bedtime, there are simply consequences for disobedience. But as the child begins to grow, ask questions, and protest, you can explain to him/her that they need 10-12 hours of sleep per night in order to grow big and smart and strong, and you want them to grow and to be healthy, so you have given them this bedtime. Since pre-teens and adolescents need a little less sleep per night, you could engage in a conversation about bedtimes and what time he/she is waking up in the morning and allow him/her to have some input.


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