The Christian F Word Part Two

We can’t alter the past but we can bring the past to the alter

After my last post on forgiveness I wanted to do a follow up post on the actual act of forgiving someone. I have had many moments where I was confused if I had actually forgiven my perpetrator because I was faced with another lot of emotions targeted at them. I have realised that the actual act of forgiveness can be perplexing; and for that reason I wanted to talk about it in more detail.

I have always looked at forgiveness as almost a religious act that must be done in a certain way to make it stick, but the Lord has shown me through an intimate relationship with Him that it’s a lot less complicated than that! There have been times I have let go of an offense without saying the words I forgive you, and there has been moments where I’ve felt led to say the words “I forgive you”. I don’t believe there are any rules when it comes to inner healing; God created us all so differently and we all respond differently to various methods of healing. Let’s chuck the rule book out and do this forgiveness thing through the leading of the Holy Spirit. What’s He saying to you right now in your journey? Lean into His shoulder, He wants to give you the steps to freedom, let Him in.

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.  John 14:26

My journey has shown me that I will spend my whole life forgiving my perpetrators as new memories surface, I must work through them as they come, and I’m okay with that. The Lord shows me what I need to know at the time and I go through the process of healing that specific memory; at the end of the healing is the process of letting go of it and forgiveness. Then later down the track the process starts again. Each time I go through this process I become a little freer than I was before I started. I’ve had prayer ministry that has lifted so much off me, and yet there is still more to work through. This is the process of forgiveness that I spoke about in the last post (The Christian F Word Part One), it’s actually a journey of forgiveness for a survivor of childhood trauma not a one time event; a journey that lasts a lifetime. Every new memory, new moment of clarity, and new realisation of the pain attached to those memories are new moments of forgiveness, new moments of freedom being released to your spirit.

When we forgive someone something happens in the spiritual atmosphere; it’s like the chains that are wrapped around your soul break and it gives a chance for your spirit to shine through the gaps. Our soul wraps around our spirit like clothes and the more we heal our soul, the more the clothes drop off and our spirit has room to shine through, we can then connect to our spirit and therefore connect to God spirit to spirit. Once this happens we are able to connect with our identity more easily. Because forgiving releases us from the grips of shame; we can connect with our identity without feeling ashamed of who we are. Trauma attacks our identity, it says there is something wrong with you, and you deserved to be abused, abandoned, and left alone in this world. God says you are accepted, loved, and will never be left alone. When we forgive, whichever way we choose to do the actual act, we change the spiritual environment around us and around the person we forgive.

There are some amazing tools out there to help us with the process of forgiving, I highly recommend going for prayer ministry or counselling. Look for someone who ministers out of the Immanuel approach and that is okay with you being on a journey of forgiveness and healing, not someone who will impose their opinion of fast food forgiveness on you, that approach actually short circuits the process and takes you back to the position of shame. Prayer ministry also can break the trauma bonds from your soul; an important part of being set free from your perpetrator.

A prayer for breaking trauma bonds;

Lord Jesus

I pray for the chains of trauma to be broken from my soul

I pray you break off any words spoken over me that attacked my identity

I pray for the little girl inside me who is scared, please comfort her, and release her from her pain

I pray that you will break off any trauma bonds created throughout my childhood

And bless my childhood, poor out your blessing over me in the womb, in my early years as a helpless child, in the middle years when my innocence was stolen, and in my teenage years when I was hurting and broken.

Release the spirit of life over me

In Jesus Name Amen

Much Love,

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